August 25th is Kiss and Make Up Day!
In honor of Kiss and Make Up Day on August 25th, we’re going to explore the myriad benefits of love, forgiveness, make-up sex, and compromise. Nobody wants to argue with their significant other, but the occasional dispute is bound to come up at one point or another. Arguments are a perfectly normal occurrence in most relationships, and many experts even consider them to be a sign of a healthy couple.
Still, almost everyone would agree that the best part of an argument is reconciliation. In fact, this process of making up with your significant other can strengthen your relationship.Read on to find out how love, sex, and forgiveness affect any relationship.
Being in love is good for your brain
Whether you’ve been with your significant other for decades or you’ve only been on a few dates, there is something undeniably special about being in love. When you first start developing feelings for someone, spending more time together and getting to know them, you might have strong emotional and physical reactions to that person. Your palms may get sweaty or you may be flooded with a rush of intense emotions when your significant other walks into a room.
These reactions early on in relationships are caused by the release of a hormone called cortisol, which can promote passion and anxiety, and is also associated with the fight-or-flight reaction. Your brain is also increasing other chemicals including dopamine, which triggers your brain’s reward system, and oxytocin, which is known to promote bonding. In many ways, this flush of hormones and chemicals acts on your brain in the same way as an addictive drug. During the early part of a relationship, you may feel like you’re walking on air and you can’t get your mind off of your significant other!
These chemicals and hormones present in the early stages of falling in love will eventually even out, but the feelings that replace your euphoria and anxiety are actually far better. When you settle into a relationship, you begin to feel contentment, trust, closeness and security. These feelings can reduce stress, boost self-esteem and promote a general feeling of happiness. People who are in committed, long-term relationships tend to lead longer, healthier lives and enjoy more fulfillment.
Does make-up sex really feel better?
Most people in long-term relationships have experienced the phenomenon of make-up sex. After a really intense argument or fight, having sex with your significant other often feels better and can make you feel much more connected. Considering all of the emotions that come into play during an argument, it’s no coincidence that so many people feel so gratified by having make-up sex.
During an argument, emotions and tensions are high. After the argument is over, this heightened emotional state can be transferred to the act of sex and give way to an intense feeling of love, rather than an intense feeling of anger at your partner.
Make-up sex also restores a sense of security. Arguments can put your relationship on shaky ground and even in jeopardy. When a couple makes it through an argument, having sex is a way of communicating that their relationship has survived and that there are enduring, mutual feelings of love and affection.
The power of forgiveness
All long-term relationships will be tested at one point or another. People are imperfect and they are bound to make a mistake at some time or another. Whether it’s a harsh comment or a complete breach of trust, your partner will make a choice that forces you to decide whether you will forgive, or hold a grudge.
Although there are certainly situations when forgiving your significant other and moving forward in a relationship is not the right choice, it’s always best to avoid harboring feelings of anger and negativity. Feeling angry will keep adrenaline levels high and put your brain and body under a constant state of stress. Holding a grudge can lead to anxiety, high blood pressure, low immune functioning and depression.
Forgiveness, on the other hand, has a positive impact on your mental and physical state. You might experience more restful sleep, more energy, lower blood pressure, better focus and a generally better mood. Showing empathy and compassion to your partner isn’t an easy thing to do, but the benefits for you, your relationship and your significant other are so much better than holding onto resentment and bitterness.
If you’re fighting, kiss and make up!
At the end of the day, no relationship is perfect. You will have struggles and arguments and you will have to make choices about how to move on. Forgiving, showing understanding and appreciating your partner for their wonderful qualities will help you let go of your anger and strengthen your relationship.